The Emotional Imprint Of The Absent Father

There are people who believe that the relationship of children with their mothers is essential, but it should not be forgotten that the relationship that children establish with their parents from the moment of birth (and even from when they are in the womb), it will also condition your life. The father’s relationship with his children is also fundamental and the father’s absence can leave a great emotional mark. 

A study confirms it

The love of a father is as important to the emotional development of a child as that of the mother according to a large-scale study has confirmed. The study included the examination of more than 10,000 cases and revealed that a cold, distant or absent parent can harm a child’s life, but not only in the present, but this emotional pain can last for decades and even a lifetime.

The review of 36 other studies from around the world led to the conclusion that the love of a father is at least as important as that of mothers, both for boys and girls. Researcher Ronald Rohner said that fatherly love is key to development and he hopes that the results of his studies will motivate men to become even more involved in caring for their children.

Misbeliefs that have persisted for centuries

In the United States, Great Britain and Europe, it has been assumed that all children need love with their mother for normal and healthy development … That the parents are there to support the mother, to support the family economically but that they are not absolutely necessary for healthy and emotionally balanced development in children.

But this belief, in addition to being erroneous, is obsolete. It is necessary that society begins to move away from that idea and that it begins to realize the influence of the father and how important it is for the children, since even sometimes, it can be greater than that of the mother herself. There are many circumstances that exist in families, but both parents are essential for the development of children.

The imprint of the absent father on the children

The results of the studies show that children who feel rejected by their parents in childhood become insecure, anxious, hostile and aggressive towards themselves and also towards others. Many of the problems that reach adulthood have to do with the emotional imprint left by the absent parent, according to the journal  Personality and Social Psychology Review.

Fundamentally, a father’s love is often as important as a mother’s. In some cases, it can be even more so. One reason for this may be that rejection is more painful when it comes to a parent with authority or who should be respected and cannot do so because he rejects him and does not feel loved or loved by him.

Children and adults around the world – regardless of race, culture, and gender – tend to respond in exactly the same way when they perceive themselves as rejected by others. Rejection in childhood has a strong and consistent effect on the personality and very negatively affects the development of children, since it opens an emotional wound within their being.

When children feel the emotional absence of their father they will have more problems establishing healthy interpersonal relationships and may even feel a continuous fear that someone will hurt them. This can also cause them to develop dependent personalities towards authority figures or the opposite, distrust and fear.

Rejection in people

There is research showing that the parts of the brain that are activated when people feel rejected are the same as when they suffer physical pain, so the damage is quite serious for a child’s development. But unlike physical pain, people can psychologically relive the emotional pain of rejection over and over again for years.

Both the father and the mother must be committed to the education and development of their children, because both are fundamental pillars for the little ones. Emotional stability will depend on the emotional stability of both parents and that is why both the father and the mother must give unconditional love to their children and provide the best positive discipline and emotional education possible.