How Does Social Desirability Influence Adolescents?
Do you remember your adolescence? What was your biggest concern? Probably one of the most prominent was the desire to be part of the group, to be accepted, valued and recognized by your peers. Everyone, to a greater or lesser extent, feels the pressure to conform to expectations, but in adolescents, social desirability can lead to inappropriate behaviors.
And it is that, in this evolutionary moment, the immaturity typical of age is combined with the fervent desire to belong. For this reason, young people can be led to behaviors that are far from their personality and that they really do not want to execute, all with the aim of giving a certain image to their peers.
Thus, work on values carried out since childhood can be a real lifeline against group pressure. In the same way, the family can act as a guide to help the young person through this convulsive stage of life. Let’s see how.
Social desirability comes naturally
Social desirability consists of attributing positive qualities to ourselves and rejecting negative ones. Thus, we give others a biased image; We try to show and extol our best qualities and pretend not to possess those that are socially sanctioned.
However, social desirability is part of our human nature and fundamental to life in society. If we did not wish to please others to a certain extent, if we did not share values, coexistence would be impossible.
Thus, social desirability is present throughout our lives. Children try to please their parents because they depend on them to survive, but also because they find their recognition and attention rewarding. However, as adolescence approaches, a significant change occurs.
Adolescence and the peer group
When young people reach puberty, a major transformation occurs in their psychological dynamics. The minor tries to find and establish his own identity and, for this, he begins to progressively move away from the family and gives increasing importance to the peer group.
Then, friends and colleagues of the same age stand as the main reference group for the young person. The opinion of the parents is no longer so relevant, they can even contradict it by system in their search for independence. However, acceptance by the group will become the adolescent’s main concern.
This would not be a major problem if the new reference group shared the values common to society and if the young person’s need for acceptance were moderate. However, it may happen that the qualities extolled by the peer group conflict with the young person’s own personality and values.
That’s when you will have to choose between changing who you are to fit in or staying true to your principles, at the risk of being rejected. Not an easy decision at a stage as delicate as adolescence.
How to help the adolescent to manage social desirability?
As we said, it is neither possible nor appropriate to try to eliminate social desirability; we will simply have to focus on keeping it at a positive level. Thus, it is essential to work from childhood on autonomy, self-esteem and self-confidence. This solid foundation will allow the adolescent to cope with peer pressure much more easily.
Similarly, it has been proven that young people with social anxiety feel the need to be approved and fear rejection more intensely. For this reason, they are more susceptible to falling into inappropriate behaviors and not aligned with their personality, in order to cause liking. It will then be necessary to treat this disorder.
Finally, the characteristics of the peer group, which will serve as a reference for the young person, are also highly relevant. It is important that our children are able to choose their companies wisely, as they will affect, to a greater or lesser extent, their own development. A group that values sport is not the same as another that praises alcohol consumption.
In short, it is a long-distance race that begins from childhood and consists of instilling in the child the confidence necessary to make appropriate decisions. In this way, the adolescent will be able to choose friends according to their own values and to stand firm in the face of pressure.
