I Will Teach You To Value Yourself My Son, Because You Are The Most Beautiful Thing In This World

I will teach you to value yourself, my child, I will make you see that you are worthy of this world, that you can wear the dreams you want because your feet are strong and your mind free to climb any peak, to touch any star with your fingers. I will teach you humility, my son, but also the greatness of those hearts that know how to respect themselves.

This message, this idea, is something that all of us, as mothers, fathers, and educators, tend to keep in mind. However, as Wayne Dyer explained to us in the book “Your Wrong Zones” , when you love yourself enough, disapproving of someone is not something you worry about or fear. This, as adults, we know very well, however, the same is not the case for children.

Thus, an upbringing and an education in which disapproval and criticism are present that we sometimes direct to children thinking that in this way “we teach them how life is going”, what will be achieved in the short and long term is to build weak self-esteem , a perception of himself so lacking in emotional nourishment that when that child is an adult, he will live subject to everything that others say or do.

Beyond what we may think, it is not easy to promote good self-concept or that strong and healthy self-worth that every child should start building very early. It is not, in the first place, for a very simple reason: if mom and dad don’t value themselves, they will sow their little ones’ hearts with weaknesses and insecurities.

Today, in “You are Mom” we give you a few keys to reflect on.

I will teach you to value yourself, I will take care of myself as a person to transmit my strengths

Something that we undoubtedly tell you on many occasions in our space is that you invest in your well-being, in your emotional health, in your personal growth. If you are happy, you will give happiness. If you know how to give happiness, you will give the world strong men and women.

The task, the effort, is worth it. Therefore, we suggest you take into account the following ideas.

I will teach you to value yourself through play

Symbolic play is a great strategy by which to begin to introduce values ​​and appropriate psychological strategies in children.

Thus, a playful and simple way to achieve this is through dolls, whether they are stuffed animals or the typical Lego dolls.

• You can recreate stories: “They tell Carlos at school that he is ugly and clumsy” “What would you say to him to help him?”, “And if you were Carlos … What would you think? How would you react? Would you really believe that you are clumsy just because another kid tells you? “

Correct from positive reinforcement

Knowing how to correct our children is an art that not all moms and dads have. We should never fall into the typical situation of “you have already broken something else again, you are the baddest child in the world”, “you have failed the exam because it is clear that you are not good for mathematics, your brother is more diligent than you ”.

• Positive reinforcement in correction is based on knowing how to tell the child what he has done wrong and how he can do it better.

• In positive reinforcement, comparisons are never made.
• At the same time, it is also based on knowing how to transmit to the little one confidence in himself: “I know that you have made a mistake, but mother trusts you and knows that you are going to do well.”

I will avoid unbelievable or bombastic flattery

Something we should know is that on many occasions, certain words, phrases and adjectives that are initially positive are not useful when it comes to working on self-esteem.

Expressions such as “you are the most handsome”, “you are the smartest in the world” or that way of praising where we just look at the child’s drawing and tell him that “it is very beautiful”, in reality they do not serve them.

The enriching reinforcement, one that promotes self-esteem and helps the child to value himself positively, requires that it be sincere, logical, adjusted and above all real.

• For this reason, it is essential that you personalize : “You are a responsible child, and I adore you for how you are, I know that you are going to achieve what you set out to do because you know how to make an effort, and even if you make mistakes sometimes, Mom will be there to help you.”
• Be objective in your evaluations and make them useful : “I like the drawing, although I think this color would have been better, what do you think?”

I will teach you to value yourself through autonomy and responsibility

To promote their self-esteem, it is vital that the child has responsibilities and that they learn little by little to be autonomous, in this way, they will feel proud of their achievements and abilities.

Nevertheless , autonomy will always be in relation to their abilities and how it shows us that it is capable of successfully assuming certain responsibilities.

This will be shown to us over time, where we will act as skilled facilitators, as wise parents who know how and in what way to offer wings, but at the same time building strong roots.